Joey and Grace, aka "Ding and Dong"

I can't figure this kid out. He's four years old, and I still have no idea what's going to come out of that kid's mouth. The other day, he tried to get my mom to give him some crackers. She said he could take some in the car with him because he was just about to leave. He said, "How about if I snap my fingers like this (snap), and then you get me some crackers?" Sheesh!

Then last night, I bought the dog some new balls. She hid her other ones and we can't find them. Joey decided to throw one over to the neighbor's yard. The neighbor was outside, so Joey climbs onto the deck and yells,
"Hey, Mr. Cory! You throw that ball back over here!"
Mr. Cory: "Why don't you come over and get it yourself?" (Mr. Cory knows how to deal with Joey)
Joey: "Because your wife won't let me come into your house!" (totally not true, although I wouldn't blame her.)

Joey also is upset that he has to feed the dog. As soon as he does, she licks his hand. I told him that's how dogs say "thank you". He said, "That's terrible."

The neighbors on the other side let me know, while laughing hysterically, that they get "updates" from the window from little Gracie. I didn't know my darling little girl was publishing what goes on at our house from my bedroom window. They especially liked it when she told them Matt was eating out of the garbage, and they could hear me screeching in the background about how disgusting it was to eat out of the garbage. I think I'll keep the windows closed from now on.